|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Don't you just love getting a little something extra? Sure you do. Everybody does. That's why Online marketers throw in 36 bonus ebooks with that little software item they are peddling.
But a little something extra is not always a good thing.
Flash back a few weeks. I was assembling a dresser for my daughter. One by one, I pulled the wood panels from the box. I pulled out a bag of bits and pieces, which was attached to another, which was attached to another, which was attached to another.
I held up the chain of bags to inspect. There were screws and bolts and dowels and nails and an assortment of metal and plastic bits for which no name exists.
I set about banging bits into boards, sliding bits into boards, screwing bits into boards, snapping bits into boards. By the time I reached step 439 of the instructions, I was finally ready to connect two panels (the bottom and one of the sides).
But wait. What's this semi-white plastic half-moon piece? And what about this black plastic tube no more than an inch long? Where do these mystery pieces go?
I reread the parts inventory ? every chapter of it ? in English, French and Spanish. I took a magnifying glass to every page of pictograms. But not a trace of either mystery piece. What should I do? I could not just throw them away. What if I discover next week that I really need them?
That's when I remembered the "Spare Parts Gremlins". These devious creatures gleefully toss spare parts in where they will most confuse us.
The Spare Parts Gremlins were there last Christmas when I was picking from a box of chocolates. I wondered what the big round one was? I looked at all the little drawings, but it just was not there.
I toyed with the idea of just tasting it. But what if it was coffee flavored? I don't like coffee. (Yes, I know. My mother dropped me on my head when I was young.) What if it was mint flavored? Sorry, but chocolate covered toothpaste just is not my thing. What if it was cheesecake flavored? Mmm. No, that would be just wishful thinking. "Ooh. I hate you Spare Parts Gremlins."
The Spare Parts Gremlins were there at the movie theatre. We were watching The Matrix Reloaded, a psychological action film, when all of a sudden a love-making scene popped out of nowhere. Neo and Trinity were expressing their friendship in a way that only a man and a woman can. The camera switched back and forth between the couple and a mass party of gyrating hips and earthy rhythmic music.
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy gyrating hips as much as the next person, but the scene was out of context like a cowboy at a tea party in an English garden. The Spare Parts Gremlins strike again!
Gremlin One: Hey, I have a love-making scene here. It's sort of a primal Amazon thing. What should I do with it?
Gremlin Two: We have to find a totally unrelated film. What about The Matrix Reloaded?
Gremlin One: That's perfect!
You just never know what gremlin will show up. You have to be prepared. Take a deep breath. In. Out. In. Out. That's it. Stay calm. OK, continue with your life.
So here I stand with one dresser, two plastic parts that I don't dare throw away in case they actually are needed somewhere, and the fear that the Spare Parts Gremlins are lurking somewhere in my house, ready to force "a little something extra" on me again when I least suspect it.
About The Author
The author is David Leonhardt, The Happy Guy, author of Climb Your Stairway to Heaven: the 9 habits of maximum happiness at http://TheHappyGuy.com/happiness-self-help-book.html and publisher of Your Daily Dose of Happiness at http://TheHappyGuy.com/daily-happiness-free-ezine.html.
Visit his web site at http://TheHappyGuy.com.
Better Links Directory Put Active RFID Satellite Tags in SpongeBobsSpongeBob has been in... Read More It was late in 1775, and King George III was... Read More Just recently my ex-husband stopped in to visit during his... Read More I will start this by saying that yes, I did... Read More With her Jamaican accent Miss Cleo, a self proclaimed psychic... Read More In Southern Germany in a town by the name of... Read More A few weeks ago I went to see a psychiatrist.We... Read More I've never really thought of myself as being funny. I... Read More For me, the piano is the symbol of what is... Read More Saturday morning. I went, in the early morning, to the... Read More I... Read More A is for Anti-Virus: she got it from my Uncle.B... Read More I went to the eye doctor the other day. I... Read More Lactose Intolerant Individuals may prove a bonus in Space Missions.... Read More Lawyer JokesQ: How does a pregnant woman know she is... Read More "Pee-ew! You smell like a skunk soaking in sardine nectar... Read More This article was prompted by something I heard (second hand)... Read More Looking for a lighthearted and fun way to remove the... Read More Banish Loans ForeverIf ordinary, hard-working, people ran the bank... the... Read More Last week, I reported how writers, stay-at-home parents and online... Read More As the cloning debate of humankind continues we find ourselves... Read More I have heard the rumblings of many of you in... Read More Joseph Yakel was born and raised in New York's Capital... Read More This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked... Read More ... Read More
Saving SpongeBob Using High Tech
American Independence ? The True Story
Not Your Average Sunday Morning
I Got to Play an April Fools Joke Before I was Born
Miss Cleo Was a Fake... NO - Really? YES Maaan!
Dog Poo - And You Thought You Had Problems
Psychiatric Psychiatrist - A Joke on Psychiatry
Dumb Luck
Humor Under The Keyboards
Freudian Slippage
Military Wives
Computers According to Carol
To See Or Not To See
Lactose Intolerant? It could be a good thing
A Lawyers Favorite Lawyer Jokes
Stopping Bad Breath Bart
The Jokes On You -- Who Should be the Butt of Your Jokes?
Voodoo Munchies
If Real People Ran the Bank - I (a spoof for the heart)
The Work-from-home Fashion Primer
Cloning Advantage Super Families
3 Surefire Ways To Combat Rising Gas Prices
Local Author Joins History and Humor To Tell His Stories
When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times
Cant Get There From Here
Movie moments are nice things to share with the people... Read More
I've never really thought of myself as being funny. I... Read More
If you ever saw Aristophanes live on stage, you must... Read More
NOTE: This article was originally published in May 2000 at... Read More
Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident... Read More
Don't you just love getting a little something extra? Sure... Read More
To: Maybelle Misfire From: I. M.. Power, VP Welcome aboard!... Read More
The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time... Read More
We... Read More
Today, Norm Goldman, Editor of Sketchandtravel & Bookpleasures is delighted... Read More
Lawyer JokesQ: How does a pregnant woman know she is... Read More
I won't lie: there are a lot of things I... Read More
I love animals but cats are my favorites. There's just... Read More
Viagra. That one word packs a lot of punch. Let's... Read More
A few weeks ago I went to see a psychiatrist.We... Read More
... Read More
I often wonder why I wake up so happy, ready... Read More
Lactose Intolerant Individuals may prove a bonus in Space Missions.... Read More
Here, for your barfing pleasure, are the top ten worst... Read More
Banish Loans ForeverIf ordinary, hard-working, people ran the bank... the... Read More
It was late in 1775, and King George III was... Read More
One of the great benefits of belonging to a health... Read More
I went to the eye doctor the other day. I... Read More
For me, the piano is the symbol of what is... Read More
I will start this by saying that yes, I did... Read More
Humor & Entertainment Humor & Entertainment |